


Shuhari

by theskywasblue



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Basketball, Blackmail, First Kiss, First Time, M/M, Romance, Siblings, Swimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-08
Updated: 2010-07-08
Packaged: 2017-10-10 11:13:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/99120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theskywasblue/pseuds/theskywasblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sha Jien's life is turned upside down when he finds himself tangled in the complicated social life of the school's student council president.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shuhari

**Author's Note:**

  * For [velvetina_wonka](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=velvetina_wonka).



In the moments leading up to the competition, Jien’s mind always focused on the same things: the moisture in the air, the sharp, almost sweet scent of the chlorine, the way his skin prickled and the murmur of the crowd in the stands was a dull, echoing roar – almost as if he were already under water – and then once he was up on the starting block, there was nothing but the water. He couldn’t have cared less that there were people up in the stands watching him, or other competitors lined up all along the pool’s edge – it was just him and that endless expanse of synthetic blue. A deep breath, a roll of his shoulders, then the starting gun would fire and everything after that was just a blur. Most of the time he reached the end of his lap not even knowing what place he was in. Sure it was usually first; but that didn’t mean a thing to him. It was all about the act of diving in, of pulling himself through the water – which felt as absolutely natural as breathing – and anything that happened afterwards was just incidental.

Jien knew that the other guys on the team didn’t really get it. The only person who came anywhere close was his brother, who could lose himself as completely on the basketball court as Jien did in the swimming pool. Still, they had come to accept that for Jien it wasn’t about winning or losing, he just wanted to swim, and they had stopped ribbing him about his trophies and ribbons, even if they still called him “The Bullet”.

Lately, though, there had been one distraction, one thing eating at the back of Jien’s mind as he crossed the deck and stepped up onto his starting block. These days, he had to spend at least a second scanning the crowd. If anyone had noticed, no one said anything; but then again, he never found what he was looking for anyway.

“Mr. Sha!”

Jien jumped, his foot nearly betraying him over the edge of the block, and straightened.

“Yes Coach?”

Coach Iwaki never had a kind look on his face, but at the moment his gaze was positively murderous. “Are you planning on joining us for the practice – because if not, then you can sit out the meet on Friday as well.”

Several of the other boys lined up along the blocks groaned audibly. They would be going against their best rival, Ushima at the end of the week, and the pressure was heavy on Jien to win top spot so they could all head to the semi-finals.

“Sorry Coach.”

He was at a loss to explain why he felt compelled to look, even when he knew the stands would be empty, and why a single, stupid incident had messed up his concentration so completely.

***

On a Friday night, the campus of Gensou High was deserted, a completely different place when compared to its hectic activity during the school day. You could walk between the buildings without bumping shoulders with any students, could move through the halls while still being able to hear yourself think. Jien loved it, and he loved escaping to the pool in the Phys-Ed building on Friday nights – not really to practice swimming since he got more than enough of that anyway, and honestly didn’t need it – but just to relax, to be able to dive in and feel the embrace of the water all around him, to just float or paddle or do some slow, lazy laps until he didn’t feel like it anymore. It wasn’t strictly allowed, but as a member of the swim team he had a key to the building for the Sunday afternoon practices that Coach Iwaki always insisted on. As far as he knew, he was the only one who ever used the key to gain access to the building after hours except Dougan. Luckily enough, their improvised schedules had never intersected, since Jien thought Dougan was a completely self-absorbed ass who probably wore his Speedo a size too small just to make his dick look bigger.

There was no sign of anyone else in the building when Jien went to the changing room, using his team locker to store his street clothes and putting on a pair of blue trunks with a white lily pattern; it wasn’t until he headed through the showers towards the pool that he heard the voices.

“...you think you’re so different – you and your father...”

“You leave my father out of this.”

Jien recognized Dougan’s voice, but the other didn’t catch in his mind immediately. He shimmied his way to the edge of the small hallway that blocked the showers from the view of the pool and looked cautiously out on to the pool deck, careful to keep his frame out of the light that hung just above the door. He could see Dougan and another boy standing near the pool’s edge. Neither of them was in swimming attire, they were even wearing their street shoes on the deck, which was completely against regulations. The other boy was the student body president...Jien couldn’t remember his family name, but his first name – Kougaiji – was easy enough to remember from the posters that had been plastered all around the school the previous semester. Jien didn’t keep up with school gossip much, but he knew the guy’s nickname was “The Prince”.

He had no idea Dougan even knew Kougaiji. As a matter of fact he didn’t think that Kougaiji had any actual _friends_, just an assortment of loyal followers, but their voices were clear and sharp as they argued back and forth – they definitely argued like there was something major going on between them.

“Listen to me _Your Royal Highness_, don’t you ever presume to treat me like one of those helpless puppies that follows you around, licking at your boots.”

“I would not –“

There was genuine pain in Kougaiji’s voice, and Jien felt himself blush, not for his own sake, but for the other boy, who had no idea that anyone was listening. He didn’t want to just assume things from overhearing a few words, but something about it was unavoidable.

“Spare me.” Dougan spat, “Just _spare_ me already Kougaiji. I don’t want to hear it.”

“Dougan...”

Whether it was a knee-jerk reaction, or an actual intention towards violence Jien had no idea at all; but a punch was thrown and then a shove and Kougaiji hit the water with a great splash. Without a pause, Dougan stormed away, heading for the doors that the spectators normally used to reach the stands, and Jien ducked back, concealing himself in the doorway, expecting Kougaiji to surface, sputtering as cursing, as he heard the door slam behind Dougan. He waited, wondering if he should make a run for it or be caught...and waited, and waited.

Something, he realized suddenly, was wrong.

He didn’t think, he just ran, spotting Kougaiji beneath the water before he even hit the edge of the pool and dove. The chlorine stung his eyes as he propelled himself down, tangling his hands in Kougaiji’s sweater and pushing them both off the bottom of the pool with all his strength. It was lucky that Kougaiji was relatively light, even in his soaked clothing, and that the swimming classes Jien had taken in middle school had trained him for just this situation. Not that he had ever expected to use it, but he was almost on auto-pilot as he pulled Kougaiji’s limp body from the water, tipped his head back, and forced a breath past his blue-tinted lips.

Two breaths, three – panic had just started to root itself in Jien’s chest when Kougaiji sputtered, coughed, and struggled to sit up.

“Woah now, easy.” Jien grabbed Kougaiji’s shoulder, helped him turn onto his side as he spat up chlorinated water. “You’re alright.”

“What....” Kougaiji rasped, “Do...”

“You – you were in the water.” Jien decided to omit the fact that he had been listening in on Kougaiji’s argument with Dougan.

“I...” Kougaiji struggled to sit up again, and Jien finally let him. He doubled over his own lap, pushing his fingers through the thick mass of his soaked red hair, “I fell. I can’t swim.”

Jien stood, helping Kougaiji to his feet. He couldn’t stop himself from saying, “What are you doing at the pool then?”

Kougaiji pulled away like Jien had burned him, heading towards the exit with his shoes squelching, still full of water. Jien ran after him.

“Wait – hey wait already!” He grabbed the young man’s shoulder, and Kougaiji spun, hissing like an angry cat.

“What?!”

Jien blinked, surprised by Kougaiji’s anger. Around the school he always seemed...well not jovial or anything like that, certainly, but calm, collected, without the slightest trace of temper.

“Uh – you could maybe come this way – get dried off? There are towels.”

Kougaiji seemed to wilt then, as if the rapid-fire intensity of everything that had happened in the last few minutes hit him all at once, and he allowed Jien to lead him back to the changing room without complaint or even a trace of resistance.

***

He had helped Kougaiji get dried off a little, and without pressing for too much information, had let him go home wearing his jacket, and with a promise to return for swimming lessons that Jien had mostly meant as a joke, but obviously Kougaiji didn’t think was funny. Since then, he hadn’t spoken to Kougaiji – but he wanted to, desperately. Just to see if he was alright, and maybe get his jacket back. He also wanted to educate Dougan on just what his little temper tantrum had nearly done, but he couldn’t, really.

He had tried to find Kougaiji for a full week afterwards, to talk to him more than to get his jacket back; but despite both being seniors, Jien and Kougaiji had none of their classes together, and definitely none of the same friends. He could almost have put the whole incident out of his mind if not for the fact that he had spotted Kougaiji in the bleachers at one of their meets, and had somehow gotten his mind stuck on the idea that Kougaiji might be there again, watching.

Watching him? That shouldn’t have mattered. Watching Dougan...now that thought just got under his skin.

***

“I said no running in the hallways! What are you – a monkey?”

“Ow – no – Sanzo!” The kid – a freshman by the lost, innocent look in his eyes – flailed helplessly, but Sanzo had him by the ear and was more or less frog-marching him down the hall, lecturing him loudly all the way. Other students gathered in the hallways alternately laughed and cowered, having more than once faced the wrath of the hall monitor from hell.

“Fuck, that guy is such a hardass, ya know?” Gojyo slammed his locker hard enough that Jien felt the vibrations up through his shoulder. “A loser too. Thinks he’s king shit just because the principal gave him a fancy sash or whatever. Disciplinary Committee my ass. Princess.”

“Oh, give it a rest,” Jien reached over and knuckled his younger brother’s scalp. “You’re just pissed off because he ribbed you that one time when he caught you smoking behind the gym.”

Gojyo’s face turned an alarming shade of pink, the same way it always did when Jien brought up that particular incident. He wasn’t sure why – Gojyo claimed to have been caught smoking, which other than being a lousy thing for a varsity basketball player to do, was nothing out of the ordinary for a guy his age.

“Whatever,” Gojyo grunted, smacking Jien’s hand away. “He’s just an asshole, that’s all. And that freshman kid follows him around all the time.”

“The one he just dragged out of here?”

“Son Goku,” Gojyo nodded. “Tried out for junior varsity this year – he’s good, actually. For a freshman.”

The look on Gojyo’s face was a mixture of admiration and annoyance. He was hopelessly competitive when it came to his position on the team. The brothers, being only a year apart, had always competed with each other; it was fortunate that their interest in sports had taken two different directions when Gojyo had discovered he had an intense aversion to any more water than could be fit in a bathtub.

“For a freshman, for a freshman,” Jien threw an arm around his brother’s shoulders as they headed in the direction of the Phys-Ed building. “Seems to me it wasn’t that long ago that they were saying you weren’t so bad for a freshman little brother.”

“Aw shut the hell up.”

“You’re not letting Banri give you hell on the court anymore, are you?”

“Fuck!” Gojyo pulled a face like Jien had just put something slimy down the back of his shorts. “Don’t get me started on Banri, man. Besides, he doesn’t want anything to do with me since I started hanging with Hakkai.”

As far as Jien was concerned, that was nothing but an improvement. Banri and Gojyo had been friends all through elementary school, back when Gojyo had failing grades and a habit of staying out of the house well past midnight. It was lucky that his friendship with Hakkai had changed all that – made Gojyo actually want to _achieve_ something for once. Gojyo needed more influences like that in his life, even if Jien had never dreamed his brother would become friends with a quiet, bookish kid like Hakkai.

“Are you going to come to the game tonight?” Gojyo asked suddenly. “And don’t beg off with practice, I know it’s cancelled.”

“Where did you hear that?” Jien himself had only just heard that morning that Coach Iwaki was out with the flu, cancelling their usual Wednesday evening practice. It wasn’t a great thing to happen, considering the meet coming up on Saturday, but it would give Jien the chance to actually _attend_ one of his brother’s games for once.

Gojyo shrugged, “does it matter? I just wanna know man.”

It occurred to Jien that this was probably the first time Gojyo had ever asked him to come to a game. Gojyo loved attention like nothing else, but he rarely sought it from anyone in their family. Their old man was too busy all the time – typical salary man, really – and other than that it was just the two of them.

“Don’t worry,” Jien answered finally, “I’ll be there – six-thirty, right?”

“Right!” Gojyo clapped him cheerfully on the shoulder, and then jogged ahead down the hallway. “See you then bro!”

Jien waved, turning the corner and heading down to the science lab. He had botched an experiment last class that he would need to repeat if he was going to get a passing grade on the exam. The chemistry lab, however, was locked when not in use, and unfortunately that meant he had to head down to the office of Dr. Nii to get permission to go in and repeat his work. The idea made Jien a little nauseous.

Nii Jianyi was, without a doubt, a brilliant teacher. The trouble was he was more than a little eccentric on top of it. Truthfully, he made Jien’s skin crawl. The man was oily – and not just because he apparently neglected to shower on a semi-regular basis – but everything about his manner was just...creepy. He was also disturbingly touchy-feely with all his students, in a way that made Jien wonder why Principal Kanzeon was even allowed to keep him around.

Then again, all the teachers at the school seemed to be a little crazy – like Mr. Zakuro, the drama teacher for a start – Nii just happened to be the craziest of the bunch.

Jien knocked once on the door to Nii’s office and waited, but there was no answer. He was about to turn away when he heard a muffled voice on the other side of the door. The shade was pulled down over the window, so he couldn’t be sure if anyone was inside or if a radio had just been left on or something. He lifted his hand to knock again when he quite clearly heard a raised voice from the other side.

“You can’t fail me! I did all the course-work!”

Dr. Nii’s oily laugh, “Are you implying I would do something untoward concerning your grades?”

A soft growl. Whoever was on the other side of that door was angry, but didn’t want to imply anything that was going to get him in trouble. And didn’t Jien know that voice?

“If you fail me, I’ll go to the principal. I’ll make sure everyone knows what a bastard you are – not just to me, but to all the students unlucky enough to be stuck in this farce you call a classroom.”

Nii laughed, “Such a little tattle-tale! And what do you think that will accomplish, exactly, dear prince? What would your father say if he knew you ran away with your tail between your legs?”

The door flew open, and Jien found himself face to face with Kougaiji – who looked like he was about ready to blow something up with a glance and a foul word. Jien stepped quickly sideways and the young man stormed past, his fury almost scorching the air.

“Mr. Sha!” Nii’s joyful croon pricked the hair on the back of Jien’s neck. “Come to try your hand at the lab again?”

“Uh...” Jien stood there a moment, aware that his mouth was hanging open more than a little. He glanced towards Kougaiji, watching the red-head stalk away down the nearly empty hall. Part of him couldn’t believe that he had just heard, and part of him thought it was so perfectly Nii. There had always been rumours floating around that the doctor sold grades – obviously it wasn’t anything that anyone could prove, otherwise the bastard wouldn’t have a job – but Jien was shocked to have the evidence right in front of his nose.

“Uh – yeah,” he said finally, uneasily, “I guess.”

***

“You mean you really didn’t have any idea at all?”

The crowd roared, almost surging forward in its excitement as one of the Gensou Dragons’ players made a run for the net, only to be blocked by a member of the opposing team at the last instant. Gojyo was playing hard, but was being downright harassed by player four from the opposing team, the Centipedes. The guy was all over Gojyo, trying to entice him to foul probably. Gojyo was smarter than that, but it was easy to see that he was starting to run short of patience. Jien was worried that any more aggravation and Gojyo – who was not exactly subtle about anything – would haul off and punch the kid. That was probably Hakkai’s worry too, since the young man was watching Gojyo’s every move like there was a target stuck to his back.

“How am I supposed to have any idea?”

“Well, you are both in the same year.”

Jien made a face more or less at Hakkai, but it was interrupted by a wince as one of the Dragons hit the court floor in a squeal of bare skin and hardwood. There were several angry shouts, but no one called foul, even though Jien was pretty sure there had been an elbow in the mix.

“Look – I don’t have any classes with the guy.”

“Well...it is quite a big deal to have someone so prestigious at our school, you realize. His father is the CEO of Houtou Corporation. They are the world’s leading medical research firm.”

“See,” Jien elbowed him amiably, “I knew you’d know all about this if I asked.”

“Because I pay attention to more than just sports – Go Gojyo! – anyhow, I’m not surprised that Nii would do something like that. Rumour has it he worked for Houtou. I suspect there was some bad blood that resulted in his leaving.”

“Well that might explain Nii being an asshole...but what about Dougan?”

“Ahaha...” Hakkai gave Jien a sideways look, and Jien could have sworn he was blushing slightly. “Surely you can figure that out on your own.”

Sure he _could_ have. That didn’t mean he necessarily wanted to; it wasn’t any of his business, really. And maybe it ticked him off, just a little bit, because he had seen the hurt in Kougaiji’s eyes and heard it in his voice enough to get the sense that Kougaiji was the sort of person who pretended to be tough when he really wanted someone to reach out a hand to help him for a while.

“It’s a shame, really,” Hakkai finished, his gaze flickering momentarily to Jien before going back to the action on the court below, “because I get the sense that Kougaiji is...well...a bit of a loner. It’s almost as if he doesn’t trust anyone.”

There was no almost about it, Jien thought. But then again, how could a person learn to trust if he was always being betrayed?

He was pretty much distracted for the rest of the game, paying just enough attention to tell that the Dragons came away with the win – though only barely. He sat in the bleachers for a while as the gym emptied out; ploughing through his memory for images of Kougaiji in the light of the things that Hakkai had told him. He could picture Kougaiji more clearly now – though just glimpses in passing – a young man alone in hallways or empty classrooms, always studying diligently, looking serious.

Always alone.

The next thing he knew, the gym was deserted, and a caretaker was flipping off the lights. Even Hakkai was gone, and Jien couldn’t remember when that had happened. He climbed down to the court floor and took the players’ exit to the locker room, wanting to check and see if Gojyo had headed home – assuming Jien had already left himself – or if he wanted a ride, since they only had the one car and were meant to share (although Jien felt, sometimes bitterly, that he did most of the sharing). He heard Hakkai’s voice as he pushed open the door, saying something about the post-game party, followed by Gojyo’s – which was barely more than a murmur so Jien couldn’t actually hear what was being said – and then he turned the first bank of lockers heading in the direction of the voices, the whole world went sort of sideways.

Hakkai had his back pressed tight up against the bank of lockers, and it looked like Gojyo was leaning against him, hands on either side of Hakkai’s shoulders. Gojyo wore only a towel, his hair hanging wet and dark, hiding his face from sight as he kissed down Hakkai’s neck. As Jien watched, Hakkai ran his hand up the bare length of Gojyo’s thigh and underneath the towel.

Jien fled, cutting back through the gym and out through the emergency exit into the parking lot, knowing that his mind would be forever scared by the image of his little brother’s bare thigh. He was going to need some serious therapy to get over it.

***

“Oh no...Dougan’s totally over him. I saw him chatting up that exchange student.”

“Which one?”

“The junior – pretty one, with the girl’s name...”

Jien slammed his locker door, the reverberation of metal drowning out the chatter that clamoured at his brain. Why was it that the entire school seemed to be full of talk about other people’s love lives lately? Then again, maybe it had always been that way and he had just never noticed; his focus was pretty much on two things most of the time: swimming, and the grades that he needed to keep his place on the team. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like to be the target of that kind of mindless chatter, to have his business laid out for the whole school to see. He felt slightly defensive on Kougaiji’s behalf, but knew there was nothing he could do about it. Besides, he had the swim meet to think about, less than twenty-four hours away; he needed to focus.

Actually, he needed to relax, which meant, he had to hit the pool.

***

Swimming was like Zen meditation, nothing but the soft splash of water and his steady breathing. Jien closed his eyes against the glare of the lights on the ceiling and just floated on his back, letting himself be carried by the water, embraced by it. He tried to picture the upcoming meet, the stands full of students, teachers and parents, his opponents and teammates lined up on the blocks, the banners and the rush of adrenaline…but distraction won out, and he was thinking, instead, of Nii’s oily smile and Kougaiji’s back retreating down the hallway.

Damn – if he didn’t get his mind clear, he was never going to be able to focus during the meet. It would piss him off to lose, especially since he and Dougan had been in an almost dead heat the last few practices. Guys in the locker room had been joking that Dougan’s new squeeze had better work harder to use up his energy or Jien was going to lose his first place standing.

Jien didn’t even fucking care about standing, normally, but shit – Dougan really had been getting on his last nerve lately, acting smugger and more insufferable than usual. Probably because Jien was slipping. Dougan had always been gunning for the top spot on the team, so it was no surprise he would take complete advantage when he could.

Shit, shit. He was so fucking screwed. Jien took a deep breath, and tucked himself into a ball, sinking suddenly below the surface of the water, holding his breath until he felt himself hit the bottom of the pool, before launching himself with all his strength back to the surface, treading water as he panted for air and shook the water out of his eyes. As he turned to swim towards the edge of the pool, he saw that Kougaiji was sitting on the bleachers.

“Hey,” he swam to the edge folding his arms and resting his chin on them, a little uneasy, remembering how angry Kougaiji had been the last time he saw him. “How long have you been there?”

“A few minutes,” Kougaiji motioned to something set on the bleacher beside him, “I came to return your jacket. It was rude of me to keep it so long.”

Jien boosted himself out of the pool, grabbing his towel from where he had left it atop one of the diving blocks. “No worries. About the other day…”

Kougaiji stood, holding Jien’s jacket, and smirked sharply, “I’m not sure which ‘other day’ you’re referring to.”

“With Nii…”

Kougaiji flinched visibly. “That’s none of your business.” He thrust the jacket at Jien, who took it quickly and awkwardly, water still dripping off him, and headed for the door.

“Wait!” Jien was surprised when Kougaiji actually stopped. “I just wanted you to know that Nii is full of shit. He talks big, but there isn’t a fucking thing he can do if you stand up to him.”

“That’s easy for you to say. You don’t know what’s at stake.”

“Maybe you should tell me then.”

He could actually see Kougaiji thinking about it for an instant; he knew he just had to push a little harder.

“You owe me you know.”

“What do you want?” Kougaiji laughed bitterly. “Money?”

“How about a burger?”

Kougaiji actually turned around then, his face darkened with confusion. “A burger?”

Jien shrugged, “I’m starving. Do you mind?”

“You’re not very good at blackmail, you know.”

“Who said I was trying to blackmail you?”

***

Kougaiji sat picking at his French fries, nibbling carefully at each one like it was some kind of delicacy; or maybe like he didn’t really enjoy them. His burger sat untouched. Jien really had been starving though, so he didn’t hesitate to eat his own.

The restaurant was mostly deserted around them – just a few salary men with briefcases tucked under the table grabbing a bite to eat after work and kids in club gear picking up something cheap to eat before a night of partying.

“Listen,” Kougaiji said suddenly, looking up from where he was pushing the tip of one fry through fallen grains of salt, “I don’t want you thinking that just because you saved my life once I need you to insert yourself into every aspect of my existence.”

“Was I?” Jien sipped his cola, left the straw resting on his lower lip. “I wasn’t stalking you or something, if that’s what you think. I had to repeat my lab.”

Kougaiji huffed softly, popping the fry into his mouth and chewing it with the enthusiasm of a predator, “You wouldn’t be the first one if you were.”

“Being the Student Body President makes you that popular, huh?”

“In a manner of speaking. People don’t seem to realize I’m only a figurehead. Principal Kanzeon does like giving people meaningless titles whenever possible.”

“And hiring crazy teachers,” Jien finished the last bite of his burger and wiped his mouth.

“Nii isn’t just crazy – he’s…” Kougaiji sighed, “it doesn’t matter.”

“He worked for your old man, right?”

Kougaiji’s frown was instant and fierce, “Where did you hear that?”

“Around…” Jien offered, not wanting to get Hakkai in any trouble.

Kougaiji eyed him suspiciously, “From Cho Hakkai, perhaps?”

Jien felt himself blush, and stared down at his tray.

“Don’t worry,” Kougaiji made a sound that was suspiciously like a chuckle, “he interviewed me last semester for the school paper. He probably knows more about me than anyone else in the school. And he’s always with your brother – the basketball player. A family of athletes.”

Jien laughed, “I don’t think of myself as an athlete.”

“You’re the star of the team, aren’t you? The –“

“Don’t say that stupid nickname,” Jien cut him short. I swear Dougan made it up just to piss me off.”

At the mention of Dougan, Kougaiji bit his lip and looked away. Jien felt immediately guilty and decided and change of subject was in order.

“Anyway, I just like to swim, is all. I’d do it anyway.”

“You do it well.”

So he had been watching – at least enough to notice Jien’s performance. He had no idea why that gave him such a thrill.

“Thanks. Speaking of, I guess I should get home, get some rest. You wanna do this again?”

Kougaiji raised an eyebrow, “Pay for your dinner?”

“No,” Jien laughed, “Talk. You got something against talking?”

Kougaiji’s brow wrinkled in confusion, as if he wasn’t used to being teased, “No, why would I?”

“Well,” Jien clapped him on the shoulder, “no problem then.”

***

And they did – at first, only in private, after school hours; then in the hallway in between classes; then they got together on weekends, went to movies, hung out at Jien’s house. Jien learned that Kou had a seven-year-old half-sister, that he played violin, and that his favourite food was fruit loops.

It was about the same time that he actually clued in to the fact that they were _friends_ that Jien realized everyone in the school was talking about them.

***

_”He sure likes his swimmers, huh?”_

_“Must be because they can hold their breath a long time.”_

_“I wonder if Sha is as fast in the sack as he is in the pool”_

Jien slammed his locker door and the two gossipers glanced in his direction, and then ran for cover. Honestly, gossiping _right_ across from his locker? That was fucking stupid. Jien tried to think about it objectively: people were bound to say shit – they always said shit. They had nothing better to do; and it possibly, probably wasn’t the only time people had been gossiping about him, just the first time he had noticed; and who cared what gossips thought anyway?

Well he did, more or less, because it wasn’t true. Even if Kougaiji’d had something going on with Dougan back at the beginning of the semester or whatever, that was months ago, and he and Jien had nothing going on. Nothing. Jien hadn’t started up their friendship just so he could get in Kougaiji’s pants, he wasn’t shallow like that. He wasn’t even sure he had any interest in that direction.

The trouble was, he also had no idea if he _didn’t_ have interest in that direction. He had never thought about it before. His life was school, homework, swimming, and rounds of Halo with Gojyo on the weekends. He had never loitered around the girls’ academy across the street, and he had never done anything else either. He thought with his brain, not his dick.

It was too bad more people didn’t do that.

Trying to keep his head high and ignore all the people he was sure were staring at him, he walked to the chemistry lab, which was – unfortunately – Kougaiji’s last class of the day. He didn’t want to talk to Jien about whether he was still having any trouble with Dr. Nii and his grades, but he still attended class on its every other day rotation, Monday, Wednesday and Friday for fifty minutes. Jien’s form went Tuesdays and Thursdays for an hour and fifteen minutes – it was hard to decide which was worse.

Okay, Jien knew that Kougaiji had it worse. Since he had a “failing grade” he had been forced to attend once weekly “make-up classes”, which meant more Nii than anyone should have to stomach on a weekly basis. He rarely complained though.

Students were all but running out of the class into the hall, but Jien didn’t see Kougaiji anywhere among them. When the traffic petered out, Jien stuck his head through the door and looked around. Nii was standing at one of the lab stations, speaking low and close to a student – Jien recognized him by the large and vivid birthmark on his face, but didn’t know his name. Nii seemed to have his arm around the kid’s back, and his hand was – well Jien tried really hard not to think about it. He cleared his throat, loudly. The kid jumped; Nii just looked up, flashing his usual oily smile.

“Mr. Sha! To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Jien stepped into the room as the kid grabbed his books from the lab table, nodded silently to Nii, and hurried out. “I’m looking for Kou…”

“Kou…” Nii adjusted his glasses, head tipped in confusion, “Oh, you mean the lovely prince! So the rumours are true then.”

Jien bit his lip, trying to will himself not to blush in response to Nii’s words. It obviously didn’t work, because Nii laughed.

“I’m afraid to say His Royal Highness was not present at today’s class. An excused absence I am to understand. A shame you weren’t made aware.”

Jien frowned. He had seen Kougaiji at lunch and didn’t remember him saying anything about having to leave early or not feeling well. “Well thanks,” he said quickly, ducking out of the room. He would just have to see Kougaiji the next day.

He didn’t think very hard about why that disappointed him so much.

***

“So I heard this rumour…”

Jien groaned around his mouthful of rice, chewing and swallowing quickly. “You too?”

Gojyo shrugged, glancing up from his plate with a teasing grin on his face. “Is it true? You and the prince under the bleachers in the gym? Kinky shit bro…”

Jien dropped his chopsticks. They bounced off the edge of his rice bowl, rolled across the tabletop and clattered onto the floor. “Fuck no! Jesus Gojyo we’re eating!”

Gojyo burst into laughter, doubling over the table. “You should see your face!”

“Fuck you!” Jien had lost his appetite. He picked up his plates and carried them to the counter, hunting through the kitchen drawers for plastic wrap.

“Ease up there Jien. Christ – I don’t care! Hakkai and I…”

“I know all about Hakkai and you,” Jien huffed bitterly, “I walked in on you in the locker room last month.”

There was a loud sputtering noise as Gojyo choked on his water, “You what?”

“It’s not like I wanted to!” Jien stuffed his leftovers into the mostly empty fridge. He was going to have to leave a note for the old man asking him for some grocery money. “Believe me, I’ve been having nightmares about it.”

“Asshole,” Gojyo grumbled, getting up from the table and dumping his own plates in the sink, “you should’ve said something. We’ve been hiding for no reason…”

“Just tell me something,” Jien turned to his brother, leaning back against the counter, “how come there are no rumours about you and Hakkai?”

Gojyo smirked, “Because Hakkai would kill anyone he caught spreading rumours.”

Jien believed that. Back in his freshman year, Hakkai had been in some serious shit over beating up two guys he caught harassing a middle school girl. The way Jien had heard it – and Hakkai had never denied it – the guys had been so messed up they’d had to go to hospital. Probably Hakkai should have been suspended for it, but he hadn’t been. Jien had never asked why, and honestly he didn’t care. Hakkai was good guy, and the idiots had probably deserved every punch.

“So what is up with you and Kougaiji anyway?”

“Nothing,” Jien shook his head quickly, “we’re just friends, that’s all.”

Gojyo shrugged, “Can’t blame a guy for asking. After all, you never go with any girls, ya know.”

“Well you…” but Jien stopped short, realizing how stupid the words were in his head. Of course Gojyo never went with any girls – he wasn’t interested.

***

That night, Jien lay in bed, staring at the ceiling – with the long crack in it, and the ugly water stain that as a child he had thought looked like a monster of some kind, ready to reach down and pick him up out of bed when he fell asleep – and thought about Kougaiji. Or rather, he tried to think about what he really thought about Kougaiji. The task put his mind spinning in circles, and sometime around three am, he decided it was more or less pointless.

There was a certain excitement to not knowing anyway.

***

On Tuesday, Kougaiji still wasn’t at school. Jien went to the Student Council office, asked around, no one had seen him.

On Wednesday, he tried sending Kougaiji a text message, and got no answer. On Thursday he called Kougaiji’s cell and got only the voicemail. He totally messed up practice on Thursday afternoon, and Coach tore a strip off him, right in front of everyone so that Jien wanted to put his fist through Dougan’s primly sneering face.

It wouldn’t have been worth it though.

By Friday, he was honestly worried about the whole thing, and since there wasn’t a meet, or a practice, he decided fuck it – even if it made him seen like some insane, creepy stalker, like maybe he was obsessed with Kougaiji, like maybe they really were doing stuff under the bleachers in the gym – he was going to track Kougaiji down and make sure something wasn’t wrong. He might not have worried so much if Nii hadn’t pulled him aside after class on Thursday and asked him _”So how is the dear prince doing lately?”_ He had seemed amused as hell when Jien had to say he didn’t know.

The trouble was, he didn’t have a clue where Kougaiji lived. They had never gone there together – it had never been a suggestion even. He’d asked Hakkai, but apparently their newspaper interview had taken place in the Student Council office, which should have been obvious really. And since Jien didn’t know anyone else who actually hung out with Kougaiji at all, his last ditch effort was to just go down to the office and ask.

Jiroshin, assistant to the principal, was sitting behind the desk, sipping a cup of tea and looking haggard. It was pretty much his normal state of being; he always looked faintly panicked about everything. Jien figured it was because he was the one who did most of the _real_ work around the office, while principal Kanzeon sat around gobbling up school gossip and coming up with bizarre ideas to increase school spirit, like Siamese Twin Day, or forcing all the teachers to spend the day teaching in Pig Latin.

As Jien leaned over the desk to get Jiroshin’s attention, the door to the principal’s office opened, and Sanzo and the freshman Son Goku came out, principal Kanzeon between them, one hand on each of their shoulders.

“Now you boys just have to learn to get along,” she was saying, in her sharp, no nonsense tone of voice, “After all, you’re going to have to be in each other’s company for a long time.”

Jien heard Sanzo snarl something that sounded like _”not if I can help it”_ as he walked by, Goku bouncing after him with a look of vindicated joy on his brightly smiling face.

“Jiroshiin, darling!” Kanzeon called, lounging in the doorway of her office like a model posing for a magazine ad, “Be a dear and bring me some tea when you’re done helping our young friend there.”

“Right away Miss,” Jiroshin answered quickly, looking up at Jien as she vanished into her office and shut the door. “What can I do for you?”

“Uh,” Jien cleared his throat, “I’m wondering if I could get a student’s address.”

Jiroshin shook his head, “I’m sorry, but I’m not allowed to give that sort of information out, you know. Privacy is very important.”

“I get that,” Jien nodded, “but see, Dr. Nii asked me to take Kougaiji his Chemistry homework – he’s been out for a few days.”

“Well then he should have assigned the task to someone who already knew the address to begin with.” Jiroshin’s fingers skittered across the keyboard, and Jien knew what he was doing exactly – pulling up Kougaiji’s records so he could check out Jien’s story. Now all Jien had to do was get a look at that screen…

"Oh Jiroshin darling!" The office door swung open just as Jiroshin choked back what sounded like an incredibly aggravated sigh - not that Jien blamed him - and Kanzeon appeared again, wearing an expression of absolute grief. "That crazy new phone contraption is acting up again - be a pet and sort it out for me?"

Jiroshin muttered something that sounded distinctly like _"that's not in my job decription"_, but was all _"Yes Ma'am,"_ as he hurried into the office - without bothering to lock his computer screen first. Jien stared after him, hardly believing his good luck, and could have sworn that Principal Kanzeon winked at him as she shut the office door.

***

He had to be in the wrong place. That was Jien's first thought as he got off the bus and stood across the street, staring up at the building. It was Houtou corporation headquarters - a towering structure that looked to be constructed of nothing but silver glass that reflected the impressive skyline around it, like a chameleon trying to make itself invisible.

He had to have grabbed the wrong address - maybe something to do with Kougaiji's emergency contact info - because this was definitely an office building, right in the heart of downtown. Important-looking men in suits bustled in and out, but since there was no guard outside the door, Jien decided that it couldn't hurt his efforts to go inside and just check the lobby out. He shouldered his backpack and dodged across the street, making his way into the building through the revolving doors. On the inside the building was all black marble and stainless steel elevator doors, tall, intricately carved columns showed what Jien thought were ancient-style Oni, frolicking - a strange choice of decor for a bio-research firm. An enormous black cherry wood reception desk dominated one wall, behind it was a set of double doors clearly posted with a sign "Authorized Personnel Only" - but the sole occupant of the desk was a little girl in tattered jeans and a brightly coloured bikini top watching something on the security monitor that clearly wasn't a security tape if the sound of explosions was anything to go by. She had her bare feet merrily up on the desk and was making her own noises along with the gunfire and explosions - "pew pew" and "kaboom" with great enthusiasm.

Jien leaned his arms on the desk and watched her for a moment, grinning.

"Let me guess, you're Lirin."

The girl jumped up on the chair, causing it to spin dangerously once, and levelled an accusing finger at Jien, her brows knit tight together.

"Who wants to know - huh tough guy?"

"Woah, settle down there champ!" Jien put his hands up and flashed his best disarming smile - the one both he and Gojyo had inherited from their old man. "What'cha watching there?"

"Die Hard," Lirin offered reluctantly, her gaze still suspicious.

"Oh yeah? I like that one. But Terminator 2 is better."

Lirin stuck out her tongue, "That Arnold guy is dumb! He can't even talk!"

"That's part of his charm!" Jien protested with a laugh, "Have you seen Conan the Barbarian?"

"Nuh-uh."

"Oh - now that's _classic_ action. What about Jason and the Argonauts?"

They chattered meaninglessly back and forth for a while, while men in suits wandered past and gave them confused looks, until Lirin finally asked, "How do you know who I am? Are you a spy? Are you James Bond?"

Jien nearly bust a gut. “No, I’m not a spy.”

Lirin’s face fell instantly, she sagged back in her chair, pouting. “Well that’s no fun.”

“Guess not, sorry. I’m here looking for your brother.”

She sprang to life immediately, like a toy that had just had its batteries replaced, clambering up over the top of the desk and grabbing hold of Jien’s shirt.

“You’re Jien! He told me about you!”

Jien floundered, feeling his cheeks heat up, “Really?”

“You have to come with me _right now_,” she sprang off the desk top, landing graceful as a cat on the marble floor, and made a bee-line for the elevators; Jien found himself running after her.

“Why, what’s the matter?”

Lirin had to jump to reach the elevator button, slapping it with her palm, “He’s been shut up in his room for _days_. You gotta get him out. He won’t even talk to me.”

Jien’s worry became confusion. Kougaiji was in some kind of sulk? He didn’t get it; Kougaiji didn’t seem like the sort of guy who would do that – it was so…immature.

Lirin tugged on his arm hard, “Could you press the top button?”

Right at the top, above eighty floors – and Jien couldn’t even remember having been in a building with eighty floors before – was a single button marked PH. Penthouse; Kougaiji lived in the damned penthouse of his father’s office building.

Prestigious, just like Hakkai had said.

Lirin chattered all the way up, until the elevator let them out at the beginning of a long hallway, lined in frosting-thick white carpet, with soft globe lights casting everything almost golden. Expensive looking impressionist paintings were lined up on the walls, complete with the little silver plaques that told everyone who had made them, and when, just so they could know how very expensive and important they were. It stank of pretentiousness, and to Jien’s mind it didn’t seem like the sort of place Kougaiji would chose to live at all.

Then again, it wasn’t his choice. Obviously all the decorating choices would have been made by his father or stepmother.

Jien followed Lirin’s bouncing footfalls down the hall to a set of tall oak double doors which she pounded relentlessly with her small fists until Jien was flinching where he stood. He was just thinking about suggesting that there had to be something else they could do to get Kougaiji’s attention when the door swung open.

“Lirin what have I told you about – Jien?”

Jien raised a hand in an awkward wave, “Hey Kou.”

“How…did you get here?” Kougaiji shook his head, scrubbed a hand across his face. His long hair was done up in a loose bun and he wore what Jien thought of as workout clothes – loose sweats and a ratty T-shirt. He looked like a real teenager for once, and Jien found himself staring a little.

“I might have…snuck a look at your records in the office.”

“You _are_ a spy!” Lirin chirped cheerfully, bouncing past her brother and into his room, oblivious to his growl of protest.

“I’m not a spy – I was just…worried.”

With what sounded like a reluctant sigh, Kougaiji held the door open and motioned for Jien to come inside. The room was huge – easily as big as the whole apartment where Jien lived with Gojyo and their old man – but sparsely furnished. Bed, desk, bookshelves, a few plush chairs and a small television that didn’t look like it got much use. The floor was varnished hardwood and one entire wall was windows, looking out over the most incredible view of the city skyline that Jien had ever seen. It took all his will not to just plaster himself against them and go _”wooooooooooow”_ like a dumbass. There was a vinyl mat on the floor, marked with footprints, coloured arrows and complicated kanji. Lirin stood on it, trying to match her feet with the coloured prints even though they were too far apart.

“Learning to dance?”

“It’s Tai Chi,” Kougaiji answered, sounding slightly defensive.

“I was joking.”

“Oh.” Kougaiji sat awkwardly on the edge of the bed, watching Lirin attempt the kata with an expression of vaguely detached amusement.

“You haven’t been at school all week,” Jien ventured. “Didn’t respond to my text message – voicemail.”

Kougaiji’s cheeks coloured faintly, “You really didn’t need to worry about me.”

Jien felt a faint pang of frustration in his gut, “You say that a lot.”

Lirin darted suddenly across the room and jumped onto the bed, bouncing twice before sprawling on the mass of pillows, “He does!”

“Lirin could you – “ Kougaiji sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “This is a private conversation.”

“But I’m _bored_.”

“Go watch some TV.”

Lirin’s bottom lip turned out in a pout that was positively toxic. Jien suspected she spent hours in front of a mirror perfecting it.

“I’m serious Lirin.”

She relented finally, slinking off to the other side of the room, doing her best impression of a kicked dog as he turned on the TV and sat herself on the floor.

“So, are you going to tell me why you’ve been shut up in here?” Jien asked after a moment of listening only to the roar of the television. Instead of an answer, he got the silent treatment. Fine enough, he had learned that Kougaiji could be stubborn when he wanted to be. Jien decided to redirect.

"Thinking of getting out at all?"

***

They bought noodles from a street vendor, bought pomegranate beer on the sly from a store manned only by a kid their own age who was more interested in reading his manga than checking for ID, and found themselves a small, deserted playground tucked in a nest of high-rise apartment buildings where they could sit on swings that made Jien feel about fifty feet tall, with cardboard boxes of noodles on their laps and the oversized beer bottle on the pavement between them.

“Nii wants me to steal his research from my father.”

Jien blinked, glanced sideways as he swallowed down his mouthful of noodles and wiped his chin on the back of his hand, “’scuse me what?”

“Nii – you know he worked for my father’s company?”

“That’s not the part that has me confused Kou.”

Kougaiji laughed, short and sharp, stared at his feet as he worked the swing back and forth. “My father is very good at covering his ass you know. He has all the scientists – all the employees right down to the cleaning staff – sign non-disclosure agreements. And the researchers sign all the products of their research over to the company before they are even allowed inside the building.”

“So he’s a possessive bastard and wants his stuff back?”

“He probably intends to sell it to one of our competitors. It would make him very rich. That’s not what he says he wants to do, of course. He _says_ he wants to take the company down.”

Jien laughed, “He can’t expect you to actually help him with that?”

“I want to do it too.”

Jien decided he had really had enough noodles. He put the box on the ground and picked up the beer, taking a heavy gulp.

“Some of the research methods my father allows are illegal – some of them are _very_ illegal.”

Jien passed Kougaiji the beer, swallowed the sudden lump in his throat, “Animal testing?”

Kougaiji smirked around the lip of the bottle, “Animal testing isn’t illegal.”

“So you mean like…human testing?”

“I can’t prove anything. But Nii – he would have had access to all the inner workings of the research department.”

“Yeah maybe, but he’s a total bastard. He’s not going to do anything like that for you. Like you said, he’s probably going to sell the shit and make a killing. Please tell me you’re not trading grades for this.”

Kougaiji looked away.

“Kou!”

“Well what’s the other option?” Kougaiji snapped, “I should fail out the year?”

“At least you’d have your pride that way.”

Kougaiji’s face went suddenly dark, so much so that Jien wanted to move away. It was as if there was a fire burning under Kougaiji’s skin threatening to break loose, Jien felt that same instinct to run, that same sense of impending danger.

“Don’t you _dare_ talk to me about pride. I had to kill my pride to put up with being my father’s son.”

Jien stayed silent, practically holding his breath, gripping the chain of the swing so tightly he could feel the metal imprinting itself on his palms. Finally Kougaiji sighed, releasing his sudden anger like a long-held breath.

“Dougan was right.”

Something inside Jien pulled itself into a hard knot. Jien let it settle there a moment, let himself recognize it for what it really was: jealousy; which, he decided, pretty much settled the whole question of how he felt about Kougaiji. It was weird how sometimes everyone around you knew the truth before you did.

“What…was he right about exactly?”

Kougaiji sighed. “That I am a coward, more or less. That I will never stand up to my father on anything because it would rob me of the lifestyle that I’m accustomed to. Things like that.”

Jien swallowed, felt his tongue slide against the roof of his mouth. “So you and Dougan…I mean were you guys…”

Kougaiji looked at Jien with his head tipped sideways like a curious puppy for a moment before he broke out laughing. “You have spent too much time listening to the rumour mill Jien. We are – were – friends, for a long time. But I suppose there is just too much different between us lately. Dougan was always a little jealous about all the things I had. He felt I didn’t appreciate them because they were handed to me…he’s like that. Very…”

“Shallow?” Jien suggested with a bitter smirk.

“No,” Kougaiji sighed, “it isn’t that. Though I think that is the way he wants other people to think he is. He feels as if he must always prove himself to others. That might be one of the few things we still have in common.”

They were quiet for a long time, just the creak of the swing chains, the far-off sound of traffic, and the sound of a child crying in one of the apartments nearby. The beer and noodles sat forgotten on the pavement; Jien sort of wished he hadn’t had any, his stomach felt strange and tangled in on itself. Plus the mix of alcohol and spices would make for a really lousy first kiss.

“Jien?”

He jumped at the sound of Kougaiji’s voice, lost his grip on the swing, then all at once he was on the pavement on his back, staring at the tiny window of sky between the buildings and trying to remember if he knew how to breathe or not. The seat of the swing was tangled hopelessly around his ankles and his arm had knocked over the beer bottle, spilling its contents across the pavement.

“Jien are you okay?” Kougaiji’s face filled his line of vision, and Jien couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yeah – I think so. I probably deserved that.”

Kougaiji frowned, hands busy trying to free Jien’s legs, “Why?”

“Because I was thinking about kissing you.”

“You were – wait – what?”

“I know, crazy, right?” Jien pushed himself up on his elbows, pulling one of his legs free. The other hung useless, like a man in traction. Kougaiji was staring at him a little open-mouthed, his lower lip wet in the faint light, and Jien’s heart was hammering against his ribs like a wild animal.

“Crazy,” Kougaiji agreed with a faint nod, “especially since you’re down there, and I’m up here…”

“So if I get up,” Jien swallowed down the lump in his throat, “it might be a possibility?”

“Only if you do it quickly before I lose my nerve.”

It seemed to take forever for Jien to knock his leg loose from the tangle of the swing, and then they stood there, with the swing swaying lazily, bumping into Jien's thigh, watching each other with nervous anticipation. Jien resisted the urge to lick his lips, watched the bump of Kougaiji's Adam's apple bob as he swallowed before finally leaning in and kissing him, more a hasty bump of lips than anything else.

"You call that a kiss?" Kougaiji gave him a look of vague annoyance.

"Well..." Jien blushed hopelessly, wanting to shrink into his shoes, "It's not as if I do this every day, is it?"

"I would hope not."

The second try was a little better - still awkward, wet, even a little scary feeling Kougaiji's tongue in his mouth - but Jien tried hard not to think, just to focus on the warmth, the thrill of another body pressed up against his own.

When they broke apart, Jien thought his face would split from grinning. Kougaiji knuckled him playfully in the ribs.

"Awfully proud of yourself, aren't you?"

"Hey," Jien shrugged, "that was a big step you know."

Kougaiji shook his head, but he was smiling too, impossibly wide like he had almost forgotten how. "Sometimes you are an idiot, Sha Jien."

"Yeah Kou, sometimes I am." Jien agreed, before kissing him again.

***

The city at night was like a vast electric honeycomb, patchworks of coloured lights both moving and still, and an ambient glow almost like daylight. Jien stared out at it all and felt impossibly tiny, but also elated. There was a whole world out there, bright and wild, and it seemed like it was just waiting for him in that moment.

"Are you going to stand there all night?"

Kougaiji sat on the bed, only in his sweats now, cross-legged and peaceful. He seemed to be enjoying watching Jien watch the city move beneath them.

“I might,” Jien flashed a crooked smile, “I’ve never seen a view of the city like this.”

“There isn’t another one like it – or at least not many.”

“I don’t know if I could live here. I’d never sleep.”

Kougaiji laughed, “Does that mean you’ve changed your mind about staying?”

Jien had the feeling he shouldn’t stay. Gojyo would be at home, wondering where he was. Or more likely, Gojyo would be at home laughing his ass off with a decent suspicion of exactly where Jien was and what he was doing because Gojyo’s mind just worked that way. The truth was, Jien was just worried about being caught, but Kougaiji had promised him that – barring Lirin – most of his family could care less about the company he kept or when he kept it.

“Like I’m going to change my mind.”

It was still hard to cross the distance from the window to the bed though. The soles of Jien’s feet tingled like he was walking across an electric floor. Kougaiji leaned back on his elbows, letting his legs stretch out so his feet dangled off the edge of the bed, and Jien planted his hands on the mattress, leaned up to kiss him.

Kissing was easy, warm and sweet. Jien could have spent his whole life kissing Kougaiji. He wasn’t quite sure about anything else yet. He heard plenty of jokes and talk in the locker room, but he wasn’t ready to equate any of it with the reality of him and Kougaiji being together in any way. He told himself that those locker room whispers had nothing to do with either of them as he touched his lips to the line of Kougaiji’s collar bone and Kougaiji’s fingers wound themselves carefully in his hair. They pressed their bodies together, feeling the soft hum of new pleasure run through their bodies and everything was perfect, just the two of them.

***

“I made a promise, you know.”

“Hmm?” Jien had discovered a particular fondness for the concavity of Kougaiji’s stomach. He liked to walk the tips of his fingers across it and watch the muscles tremble. “What promise?”

“To my mother,” Kougaiji rolled free of Jien’s touch, ignoring the small sound of protest, and padded slowly across the sun-streaked bedroom, “I promised her I would be a better man than my father.”

The beat of his footfalls changed minutely as he stepped onto the practice mat. Jien turned, watching the ripple of muscles in Kougaiji's back as he began to move along the painted lines.

"But I thought that to be better, I first had to become him. Overcome him. And then somewhere along the way, I stopped being myself. So who am I, really?"

"Kou."

He paused, looked back over his shoulder. The sunlight cut across his shoulder and down at a sharp angle, dividing him almost cleanly in half. Another step forward and it would spill across him entirely. "Yes?"

"No," Jien laughed, "that was my answer. You're Kou."

Kougaiji chuckled, abandoning his kata and walking back to the bed. "You know, I think I'd like that."

"So you're going to come back to school then?" Jien turned on his back, stretched.

"I suppose I have to." Kougaiji lay down with his head on Jien's stomach. "Even if Nii might fail me. But you were right, it's better to fail out the year and know I took a stand than to give Nii something when I know he's only going to betray me."

"No reason to give him anything at all. That's what summer school is for."

Kougaiji's eyes drifted closed, "Though it means a slow start on studying for my entrance exams..."

"Kou," Jien thumped him lightly on the shoulder, "life's not all bad, you know. Even when it is."

Kougaiji frowned, "That doesn't make any sense."

"It does, trust me."

Kougaiji sat up, "Trust you?"

"Kiss me?"

And finally, perfectly, a smile. "What if I do both?"

"That works too."

***

A splash, the cool embrace of the water, the faint sting of chlorine. Jien swam hard until he could touch the bottom of the pool, felt it slide rough under the skin of his palm, and then turned, kicking back towards the surface where the sunlight glinted off the water like an illusion, broke out into the open air with a gasp.

"Are you sure you don't wanna come in Kou?"

Kougaiji looked at him from across the empty deck, pushed his knees and thereby his textbook up higher to conceal the expression on his face. "I'm studying! And you know I can't swim."

Jien floated on his back, staring up at the blue sky, from their vantage point on the roof of the Houtou building it was completely open, as endlessly blue and a giant pool of chlorinated water. "There's always time to learn, isn't there?"

-End-


End file.
